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Old 04-02-2011, 10:10 PM   #1
w5zy2nq7fq
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话说,许多年以后,科技发达了,人们生活水平也提高了,大家出行乘坐飞机就像今天我们挤公交一样。。。。。 。

售票处

自动广播里传出这样的声音:某航100001航班,目的地北京,票价10元,不设找零,月票请 出示。

安检

人声鼎沸,有人扛着蛇皮袋,有人拎着活鸡活鸭,安检员满头大汗:“您这可得补票,超重了。”“凭什么啊?上 次背了两麻袋土豆都让我过去了。”另一个乘客凑过来:“来来来,哥们儿,抽根烟,我这批活鸡不麻烦您了,机 舱摆不下,您帮我绑机翅膀上得了,反正它们自己也能飞,不浪费飞机的动力。。。。。。”

登机

空姐都戴着红绣箍,挥着小旗,拿着扩音筒:“都别挤,排好队,里面的,就是你,别在那儿发愣啊!往里挤挤。 。。。。。你,你票呢?没买票就上来了,罚十元!什么,你是王机长他老舅,那什么那,算了,进 去吧。”

起飞

飞机爬升到80层楼的高度,正在城市上空盘旋,机长打开舱门,喊道:“嘿!80层楼顶的那位,北京走不走, 十块钱一位!有座儿快点上来,我给你停一分钟,你跳过来!”

飞行

一个小朋友要求小解,空姐:“厕所都让土豆占了,这样吧,我给你打开门,你就先将就一下吧。对了,外面风大 ,系好安全带啊!”
副机长:“看,头儿,前面有架飞机!”机长:“混蛋,是100002号!这小子就知道跟我们抢舱线,告诉后 面坐好,我要超机!”

飞行途中

空姐:“机长,外面有UFO耶!”机长:“快看看里面有几个!外星人20元一位,问他们走不走?”乘客发牢 骚:“都挤成这样了还。。。。。。”飞机剧烈抖动。
空姐:“各位乘客,刚才飞机出了故障,两个发动机坏了,我们可能会晚点。”乘客:“怎么搞的,要是四个发动 机坏了,我们岂不是要在天上过夜!”

空姐:“机长,刚才有个小朋友小解时掉下去了。”机长:“背降落伞包了吗?”空姐:“背了,不过书包还在这 儿。”机长:“嗨!你瞧你们这点事儿给办的,把书包也绑个降落伞空投下去,小孩子,没书包怎么 上学!”
副机长:“头儿,北京地面消息说,那边又堵机了,让先停廊坊。”机长:“告诉乘客准备提前空降 。”

降落

空姐:“各位乘客,本航班即将到达目的地,降落时请坐着的乘客系好安全带,请站着的乘客系好。。。。。。那 个。。。。。。系好裤腰带!”

落地

空姐:“机长,晚上哪儿吃去?”机长:“你们哪,一天到晚想着吃,上海团购网,这个月任务又完不成,没了奖金,我看你们都去喝西北风!你赶紧再到售票处去一趟,跟小张说一声,来了乘客 先给我们装上,趁着早,我们再飞一趟!”
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Old 04-03-2011, 12:04 AM   #2
qrst319
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