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Old 08-16-2011, 03:11 PM   #1
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Default 55 of the {livestock} joke , {also} {comic} , you

1, the day in a friend's house, the phone did not know where did not find it, to borrow a friend's phone call about his girlfriend and listen to where it is. I enter my number, one press turntable clasp, the screen shows that she saved my name: SB3 (then pleased, but fortunately a third ...)
2, while I excavate pocket, a opener out, was not found, then go back and look!
a pair of juvenile sweethearts in the street where the man suddenly said excitedly: Who? In the end is this?
I thought is the key to quickly say: My, my! My
after studied, had that woman productive. . . . Poor my face ah. . . Pain for a few days
3, opened today in the school group conferences, sudden unexpected sneezed, looked up, it was found in front of the girls nose Biao to the back of the woman and not aware of, so secretly want to help her delete, just his hand up, next to the girl discovered, shouting a cup of dry for a stomach have responded. . .
rushed to the toilet, not stand on spewing out of the full one place ah. . . . Rustled the mouth back to sit down, nothing like people. After a while, a friend got up and said to the toilet, I kindly advice: money aperture in the
7, middle school, a job done well, work on the teacher gave me this batch of two words,Nike Shox Norge, redo,
2 morning I went to Mai Zaodian, and then the action of this to help me disburse him the same chart,
the most prestigious places, and he wrote back in the redo old one, do not do. paid,
Next, on a catastrophe,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, more tragic is the graduate presently, he told me ,,,,,,
8, in the mobbed avenues back to go short-handed whistle broke the sound, not react, a Buick commercial traffic to hit my shoulders; I did not obtain petulant, just gently took out the key, in the course of its progress consist in ... The blueprint of the Road graceful arbitrage
9, in a stall to buy socks, a pair of inexpensive, had to buy thirty pairs, the results of only black models of the same, selling socks Huyou I said, a color is good, lost a altitude who can take the other can not see ... I thought also, so bought a thirty pairs ....
So two days a alteration of ...
Results After nearly two months, I really could not stand the same table, and said: slothful you a lot, how two months you do not even say for a pair of socks
I :....
10 recent cooling of the highway to see a strong man, open cars roadster, wearing a motorcycle helmet.
11, on a whim, to take their own photos for desktop ... and then my computer on poisoned ...
12, tall school with methodology ridiculousness
Petrochemical ... ...
after a while I
do it online to find a wife the day before yesterday
financial software, I'll give her microprocessor, I sit and see, wife of versed open www.google.com, type in the search bar Open Baidu, something she continues to find - - +
now, I'm looking for something that will be with his wife, to google Baidu, ... ...
14, say the students parents.
the beginning of love his parents. One day to go shopping, his mother took a fantasy to a jacket, but a look at the amount to pluck his father away.
his father said: we can not furnish can not try? His father on his mother and forcibly into the closet room.
change out of his mother, his father a look at the East West Chou Chou, took his mother ran, said: Run! While the seller is not!
his mama wearing the jacket, label drifting out, shuffled out by his dad flew, just passing through a pillar, his mama holding a tearful post. His father back serious, said: Run! You are not waiting to be caught ah?
his mother cried even more fiercely. Then his dad laughed: ha ha ha ha ... ... clothes when you go in the money I paid before.
15, batch jobs, see the students do not paint geometric problems, readily Comments: No map no fact ~



16, his girlfriend would favor to check the bill, send txt messages to 10086: I The bill left the number of
17, students A car event, thigh rupture, hospitalization
few of us went to see him play good students entered the inpatient
met him on my parents
rapidly went to query A's condition on the results of an open
becomes
.
18, in high school, the most funny thing that would
money, we constantly piece in to buy cigarettes, I was two and my buddy just bought a Heyan
prepared to go to the toilet pumping the results to class, the class teacher's class, forget it
first class when the class to see the fellow prowling wrote a memorandum, then rub a large group, I was thrown over
see the class teacher, class teacher instantly down and taken away, standing on the podium began to read
sweat ing, if I kas long asis written is valid, I would prefer not swallow her
teacher and a mouth: (my sobriquet, if there are perplexing one hundred students to recognize me, I) br> pain ... ...
classic appeared

19, my roommates make amusement of me, my billfold secret in a mini box, MD The problem is that little box that I sent to Guangzhou to Nvwang a award sent to me too many bad two days after the finding his wallet was gone. I am in Wuhan, my personality card, bank card,Nike Shox R3, his girlfriend of photographs in Guangzhou Nvwang hands.
20, Yesterday at Wal-Mart,Nike Shox Sko, suddenly impair my tolerate, suppressing burst into the bathroom, just an earth-shattering blasts began to crouch, the results of the babies next door and burst into tears, her mother asked her how, she said, smelly ~ ~
21, arrived in the coastal, unpacking is completed. The addition of an training task is to behave anti-landing exercise fort division, and everybody flew the vehicle to prepare. I was weight-bearing wheels with grease pistol to grease, fat department political commissar standing behind me a moment and said with concern: small comrades hard it! I did not expect tanks to shove the morale of 12 wheels, tanks, soldiers not effortless ah! I was moved almost to tears
.
22, high school class when we get together is always smoking
day I happen to have a more pride of things to differentiate you the results I smoked slow
other people smoked, and I left half-root, look quick to class, huge mouth suck two
teacher suddenly came in, I asked myself a thrown on the ground, their feet, but just a tread
cigarette smoke into the two had to hold your expiration
have seen the class teacher, came over and asked me, you is not smoking it
I shook my head
teacher: teacher talk
proceeded shaking his brain
anger: you gave me to speak
me: ... pumping ... I do not smoke ... ... (according with the smoke from the snout and mouth often spewing)
teacher did not choked laugh ... ...
23, today, work colleagues and I went out to supper, we were a point tray chili scrambled eggs, and found cilia and colleagues use chopsticks cilia, shouting, you penetrate the foreman ~ ~ What namely this? Boss a see, oh wail ~ phoned, to, come here! To the lady for a couple of chopsticks
24, spent 50 greenbacks on the Internet to purchase a piece of hand-made face soap, with a day or two at night analytic about the time that has been slender with half of the upon also have a soap spume, angry I am vomiting blood.
my father said you this fine to use soap, bath covered with sleek.
25, the 1st Italian to dine pizza, do not know eat everything, on the point were 38 yuan and 8 yuan to send a cheese pack.
complete repast and found someone was absent, I thought, had distant fewer cheese,
then cried: server, my share of cheese not on how ah? I have finished, and also allows people to eat?
Waiter: Sir, you that have been gushed in your cheese pizza a ...
me: all right, you go to a busy bar ...
26, at midday back to the hostel, I saw a glass Coke, direct a full drink. Drinking my face was green. Quarters that the man had bought a bag of vinegar dumplings, no location to fall, with my cup installed. . .
27, topics like the teacher to join them, one day the teacher Topic: my people more forgetful, and final night bath and forgot to turn off the gas ...
then my mom helped me wash up the muff above the side of the side said: So you definitely tin not sin, for it naturally ambition leave certify of a guilt .. .
29, to complete a physical day, not starving, went to the restaurant, many people, too compact, and muddle, I call on the Dafan Aunt: , ladies who cook on the inside shouted: flow sounded, I do not know which day to kill the person in a blue ballpoint pen and drew a circle, write, this is the killer ... ...



31, I live like a sophomore next door true story ..
person A teacher at the school was found sleeping ... well done ..
he called a solution to the blackboard in front of the subject .....
not ready to write the words of public humiliation A
truth a blackboard the teacher did not come to him began to sour grades are so bad ..
dare to sleep really shameless
school head is not at home ... merely to sleep all day .. .
did not calculate he would actually write ... .. the solution is also very pretty ...
teacher a morsel clumsy location ... had to let him behind seat do not control him well ....
He actually did not think the teacher was kind enough to choke one ....
I sleep for about
you will still not be the ask me
32, my sibling went to a school playing basketball,Nike Shox TL1, hearing to a low-grade girls to a low-grade boy asked: you say I love your ..
33, saying that my girlfriend hit a summer job in a mobile phone sell phone
Square One day at noon, luncheon time, about no stores, my girlfriend next to the counter to the an uncle-class people will look at cell phone, just that partition of the counter not to eat the MM, weakly, looking like uncle also buy a mobile phone Zhu Er, no arm on the counter together with the branch heads, because MM Chest (crab) of relatively massive, the uncle suddenly found watching it to see MM's milk (crab) trench, all eyes look straight, my wife found out, would like to remind that MM, MM no results repercussion, after a few minutes, MM openings: Big Brother, watching enough? seen enough to buy a cell phone it ... ...
result uncle said nought, bought a cell phone running for the door and fled on a ... ...
34, My friend said, a colleague of his relatives to Xiamen, Xiamen, e relatives gave a anime, on the bus, the driver who looked at this e cartoon, wanted to find the position, the driver stopped him and said: full read: the door to maintain a equilibrium, then they feel a shit to bring an end to ..., so he began to compel, the coerce too used unknowingly hand, the results of... I X,Nike Shox Sko Norge, broken locks, I coil out.
you want your students at the students outside to see the scene?! a light (crab) Ding students suddenly rolled out from the lavatory, going to the toilet is also accompanied by a PP in the spurt out from his , absolutely frightful!!! and a layer we basically knew, I X!! this life in front of their classmates gang inhibited the ...
36, the morning her husband took me to the unit left and then I suddenly received his text message: Bus windows were shut, the car smells bad some people are surely frown. But that air of MM is very natural to her from his pocket and saw a fodder on the side of the mouth and open the window a gap, greedy sucking the outside climate 。。。。。 would an mean person ah =. =
38, our math educator likes masquerading to be comic to mention a joke that not 1 laughed
our class consult a spoof on him, so the first object he said when the school, we all laughed in unison
day he came in, was silent for a moment that his father died
I immediately burst out laughing, others calm.
39, water and taint it
see a cashier in a very serious cluster of coins
a few kids ran, ran to sing: in front of the downstream bridge over a group of ducks, Come Come and count, twenty-four thousand 6 hundred seventy-eight 。。。。
and then the cashier is depressed along half the number of coins to go back and re-number ....
40, high school boarding school, some students go home to let him take along something to help me, they send text messages: I boil clothing and money.
41, and girlfriend, dating, see the front and my girlfriend like there's a, it took up under her ass.
she cornered around and gave me a slap.
when somebody tap my shoulder I turned around ...
girlfriend gave me a slap.
42, the day suddenly take a phone call: Oh, surmise there is a gift! Not that I hang up! call to my bureau, said: posted to our Xinghua this corporation.
this newspaper really is too sudden, when the two of us in the army then do not say, feeling particularly agreeable few annuals antecedent lost contact, dream that he suddenly came to our Xinghua I told him on the phone, I swiftly went to elect him up their cooperative unit, get together at noon.
I went apt their cooperative unit, chap!'s truly impressive, entire exotic treatment mode, connected the enterprise the door on cross-examination the barricade together, register, sign especially rigid approximately my comrades who are stationed in units of human, I joined the company had coincided to guard.
I went to the old guy said workshop, to see old comrades I nodded at me, and made a face. I average I do comprehend, not to rush, do not grant parlor, let me in the side later on.
I am bored foolish, in the workshop in turn for a when, from the bag and took out a newspaper point of view up in the shop door and suddenly there is a boss who went to look behind me, stood alongside a security, he looked at me, patted my shoulder and said: That is the boss, you do not even know he was still here what mingle merge. point of others, got off the phone to send the patient to go to the spoken medication, I gently into the apartment, gently buffet {awake|awake} patient, and said softly: Grandpa, up to pilfer edible right!
45, last night boiled crab, open water, I threw one crab pot. crab is very fresh in the pot meddle.
good wife to play cautiously, you can not see this, then over his eyes can not hide behind me look.
I relieved said: Allison, we are not also bloody?
wife: ah ... ... ... ... salt anyhow?



46, sitting today bus, there is a one-stop driver asked: Do not install the
48, Dragon Boat Festival to go to the unit sent a box of breast and a sack of Thai rice Shanghao unit a woman colleague afterward go to help me help him push back home, downstairs, the colleagues I said: My husband was not home, hurry up! take more than, NND, that area where there are a lot of people know me. he ambitioned to remind her not to shout: . My husband was not home, hurry up, so worried immediately! : Students, today, not level, educate
50, one daytime more than 4 in one night a friend called to say the sentence: Q Do you have what material. curse words on periodical, it says morrow, if you do not duplicate the contents of this paper 50 times, then sent to other people, will dead is difficult to see, and so on and so on. I was frightened of the students go home on the night quickly copied 50 The afterward day sent to others,Nike Shox NZ, sent out a few begin, yet then we know what it is, do not say that he fed to the periodical, so the morning passed, and his hands also the accumulation of several dozen .
afternoon, the first music class, the teacher points to his label happened to him sing, I saw the crying little boy stood up and said sadly: ah ....understand, but a strong patriotism told he could not lose face in front of the Japanese, so he smiled and nodded blindly: 53, my wife and I play to the Reclining Buddha, his wife walk the road, so I carry her.
saw one antique woman, serious, said: peruse the writing to see who you are. his wife is sick or go to the hospital early, Buddha is useless
54, the students travel, approached the top, a special excitement hilltop girls shouted: motherland, ah, my mother! then a crush on this inciting special woman shouting boys: the motherland ah, my wife's mother!
55, my house has been rented to a Japanese visitors, day visitors kick me that a phone with a not quite eloquent in Chinese, said: scampering out, could you help me add it!
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