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.' She sits
upstraightshocked. Because I could describe a bookartthat noble
activityas damned. I say: 'All you've done is to bring mestep by stepto
the subjective knowledge of what I knew before anywaythat the root of
that book was poisoned.' She says: 'All self-knowledge is knowingon
deeper and deeper levelswhat one knew before.' I say: 'But that isn't
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LessingDoris - The Golden Notebook.txt
good enough.' She nods and sits thinking. I know something is coming
but I don't know what. Then she says: 'Do you keep a diary?'
'Off and on.'
'Do you write in it what happens here?'
'Sometimes.' She nods. And I know what is in her mind. It is that the
processwriting a diaryis the beginning of what she thinks of as
unfreezingthe releasing of the 'block' that stops me writing. I felt so
angryso resentfulthat I couldn't say anything. I felt as ifin mentioning
the diaryin making it part of her processso to speakshe was robbing
me of it.
[At this point the diary stoppedas a personal document. It continued
in the form of newspaper cuttingscarefully pasted in and dated.]
March50
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LessingDoris - The Golden Notebook.txt
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